From Pogs to Pods

Nothing makes me feel old quicker than being confused by fads of a younger generation. I recall always hearing “I’ll never understand you kids” throughout my youth, and my reaction was to think they just didn’t remember what it was like to be young. I assumed those adults were just past their prime, with no sense of humor, and no desire to take part in something new and exciting.

Music was always a great demonstration of generational detachment. It seems that every ten years or so, each musical genre progresses beyond the comfort of nostalgic tunes we know and love. Now, I am not yet to the point of yelling “what is that noise you kids are listening to?”, but I’m getting close. And I’m a lover of all music. I’m always listening to new styles, constantly being inspired by something fresh for my ears. But there is a lot coming out these days that forgot to make use of any particular talent.

Another timestamped age indicator is fashion. The amount of change in fashion that I have witnessed in my 32 years of life is astounding. From the tacky and colorful clothes of the 80’s (let’s not even mention the hairstyles), through the 90’s filled with extremely loose fitting clothing (pants that could fit an extra body in each leg, or extra long and worn only half the distance to the waist), and into the 2000’s where everything was far too tight on everybody.

Fashion today seems to be running an “anything goes” policy. It has become perfectly acceptable to dress yourself in the same manner that my 4 year old son does. Honestly, he probably does a better job at customizing his outfit than some adults I know. Toddlers are dressed like they are ready to go hit the club, while adults are dressing like they are ready to hit the playground. The only style that hasn’t changed much over the years is that of business people, but I’m sure those days are coming to an end with everybody threatening lawsuits over their rights to freely express themselves.

Before I continue, I’d like you to think about that for a few minutes. We are severely lowering our standards as a society. I’m not saying it’s unacceptable to express yourself by whatever means you choose. What I am saying is that we keep lowering the bar of expectations, no matter the time and place.

It comes down to respect, really. If you like a job, present yourself in a respectable manner to show your appreciation for the employment. If you go out to a fancy restaurant, dress the part and make the experience more enjoyable for everybody including yourself. Attending an event at your child’s school is a great opportunity to look like a parent who loves their child, and not like you just barely managed to get out of bed before getting caught in an actual train wreck.

Bathing suits don’t belong in funerals, sumo outfits are not acceptable at weddings, you need to dress like an adult at work, and your toddler shouldn’t look like they hang out on Hollywood Boulevard when they’re at school. I’m not even a big fan of seeing pajamas in public, but if that’s your prerogative then so be it, just be prepared to be judged by those of us who dress ourselves before leaving the house.

Now let’s get to personal entertainment. When I was young there was a phase where kids were collecting and trading POG’s. Today the latest trend is to record yourself eating Tide Pods. And one unfortunate soul who vaporizes a Pod. Once again, the internet has turned a funny joke into an all too real epidemic through the power of memes.

I have done some silly things in my life, but never have I thought that eating or vaporizing toxic laundry detergent would be a “fun thing to try”. In fact, I remember when soap in the mouth was a form of punishment. This is a very sad time for me, because I either have to admit I’m too old and will “never understand these kids”, or I must come to realize that someday these Pod eaters could be running our country, or world.